Before the madness that is selecting a PhD program become a reality, I had grand visions of doing something really fun and creative to share my choice with everyone. My initial idea was to do a spin-off of Lebron James and “The Decision”. Unfortunately, Jeremy Schapp wouldn’t return my phone calls requesting that he host the event. Also, I was having trouble lining up sponsors for a one-hour special and couldn’t get a network interested in the idea of devoting prime air time to discuss where I would be taking my talents this Fall.
Then, the choice became really hard and I started devoting constant brain power to actually making the decision, with no thought whatsoever being spent on how to convey the news. So, you are stuck with a plain ole blog post and maybe a few witty comments.
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If you’re good at picking up subtle messages, you may have noticed from the title (featuring the mascots of two of the four institutions) that the choice came down to Oklahoma State and Florida State. The brief flirtation from Texas A&M ended this morning with an email at 9:45 AM, officially rejecting me. While I’m disappointed that I didn’t get to visit with them and officially interview, making it to the handful of candidates under consideration was a great honor. Most of the sports world scoffs at the idea of “moral victories”, but I’ve learned that there is such a thing. In fact, in the spirit of March Madness I offer an NCAA tournament analogy: staying alive in the applicant pool to the end at places like Chapel Hill and A&M is (for me) the equivalent of a 6 seed making the Final Four. Those are good teams that just didn’t have all the pieces, but still made a nice run at the title. Similarly, my GMAT score was below my expectations, but I put what I had together and made a strong run. While I’m disappointed, I’m not disheartened. I quieted my self-doubt and showed myself that I belong.
Georgia State and Auburn truthfully fell to the wayside shortly after visits concluded. Both had some impressive things to offer and unique program elements, but the placements were more impressive at OSU and FSU. Georgia State’s small size was also a factor and I got along better with key faculty at OSU and FSU than I did at Auburn.
When I relayed this all to my best friend, he immediately shot back an email that said:
Well, have you thought whether you wanted to be a cowboy or indian?
An interesting dichotomy, to say the least. I thought about the psychological indicators of preferring the characteristics of one mascot over its rival (historical, not collegiate). Then, I remembered that I actually had to make a REAL decision, not a theoretical one and decided to move on to my analysis of actual characteristics.
I won’t rehash the entire back and forth between me and the inner circle and my mentors, but will attempt to hit the highlights of my thought process and then show you where I landed.
Placements
Where you get your doctorate matters a great deal. Despite the fact that the best candidates don’t always end up at the same handful of institutions, the job placement process has perpetuated this perception. That said, better placements lead to better students, and better students lead to even better placements. So, there is somewhat of a truth to the self-fulfilling prophesy. Oklahoma State has had its most recent placements at Clemson and University of Georgia. Florida State has had its most recent placements at West Virginia and University of Arkansas. Despite what you may think about the geographic and athletic make-ups of those schools, they all have very good Management departments and are considered strong placements for Assistant Professors. For the record, Arkansas is the top Organizational Behavior group of those schools and one of the fastest growing (in terms of reputation and productivity) departments in the country. Yeah, I was shocked, too.
Bottom line, either program should give me a strong opportunity for a good first job out of doctoral work.
Faculty
Who you work with is almost as important, if not equally as important, as where you attend. Faculty with stronger publication records, national prominence, and experience at other institutions can open a lot of doors for you. Unfortunately, you can’t determine who will be your advisor before you get there (usually) or who you will really click with during research projects. Campus visits and interviews give you an idea, but the data you have is so limited it would be like trying to select a spouse after a speed dating event.
Oklahoma State has a young, energetic, and largely un-tenured faculty in Organizational Behavior. I got along with all of them really well and did not meet anyone I thought would be a struggle to work with. The pros to this are that they are hungry and will be aggressively publishing in top journals to try to secure tenure. More projects gives doctoral students more opportunities. The cons are that younger faculty are less proven and lack the national acclaim to carry significant weight when you hit the job market. Also, if you want to stray outside of a traditional research area, faculty without tenure are less likely to take the risk with you.
Florida State has more senior Organizational Behavior faculty and have one of the most prolific publishers of the last generation. I have dubbed him Yoda (the Force is strong in that one). I got along with several FSU faculty very well, but a couple had quirks that may not make us the most compatible (the inverse is also true, I realize). The pros of senior faculty are that you know what you’re getting (you can see their record pretty easily) and you might be able to talk them into exploring new areas with you (tenure gives greater latitude for risk-taking). The cons are that you don’t know how long you’re going to have them. They could retire before you graduate and leave you with an unfinished dissertation without the sponsor you really want/need. We call that being up Poop Creek, sans paddle. Not a comfy place for a doctoral student.
Bottom line, it came down to potential versus experience. More on this later
Students
As mentioned discussing good placements, top students can be an indicator of increasingly prominent placements. Not a guaranteed predictor, but one that should not be ignored. Oklahoma State had good students. Florida State had better students.
Bottom line, it isn’t a determining factor, but I identified more (on intellectual and personality levels) with the FSU crowd.
Location
Neither city has the offerings of Atlanta, but Tallahassee provides significantly more to do than Stillwater. Pros are obvious; I wouldn’t be bored. Cons are also obvious; I might be more distracted. In truth, I was torn on this criterion as much as I was on the faculty. While it would be great to have more to do, I was really worried about being distracted and looking for a sabbatical of sorts over the next four years. Adding to the dynamic is the presence of family in the Sunshine State. To some, this would make the decision obvious, but not for me, the self-proclaimed Black Sheep in a number of areas. It may not surprise some of you to learn that I was ready be pack up the truck and head a 1,000 miles away, if only in the spirit of being different. Don’t judge me; it’s the part of me I wrestle with most.
Bottom line, my inner circle felt the need to remind me that the over 30 crowd in Stillwater might leave me bored to tears, forcing me deeper into my research and potentially causing burnout. This was the biggest source of external (to me) debate.
Facing My Fears
Not surprisingly, all this thought and analysis ended up with me creating scenarios and visions in my head based on my own perceptions, rather than reality. As I neared the end of the decision-making process, I realized I was about to base my decision on something that no one should ever place much weight on: assumptions.
I assumed that Yoda would retire soon. Complicating matters, he is married to another Organizational Behavior faculty member. If I lost him, I’d most likely lose her, too. That scared the crap out of me. I also assumed that I wouldn’t be able to follow my own research passions at FSU (part of this assumption was based on innuendo from other programs). As a “closet control freak” who likes to do things his way, that also scared the crap out of me. When I realized that these were going to be my determining factors, I decided I needed to clear the air surrounding the two fears. I set up a call with Yoda to ask him, point blank, when he planned to retire. I also set up a call with the program director and a fourth year student to ask about the ability to chase research rabbits in an area outside current faculty expertise (I wanted both sides of the story).
The results: Yoda and his wife plan to be there for at least 10 more years. He was not offended by my inquiry, was glad to hear how thoroughly I was thinking through the decision, and added:
“If you do decide to come here and are still in the program when I retire, you and I are going to need to have a SERIOUS discussion.”
~Yoda (not the real one)
The fourth year student assured me that, provided I could sufficiently ground my idea, I would be able to chase my mental rabbits. The program director echoed that sentiment and follow-up our call with an email of 8 recent dissertations outside the primary research areas of existing faculty.
The Choice
I took all of the above information and some other factors I haven’t discussed here and went through everything one more time. I made a tentative decision and decided to sleep on it. The next day, I woke up calm and was ready to declare the choice made.
FEAR THE SPEAR, BABY!
I would become an Indian.
In the end, the presence of Yoda, quality of life, challenge, and professional development swayed the decision. As much fun as it would have been to pack up and move across the country, I could not ignore the opportunity to learn from Yoda. On top of that, I realized what quality of life meant to me when I walked out of Fresh Market at the end of the decision process. I am sort of a food snob. I went home and Googled “Stillwater groceries”. Here are the top results:
1. Wal-Mart Supercenter
2. IGA
3. Git ‘n Galup
Yes, the third name in the list is the convenience store attached to a Texaco station. Probably not going to find quality sushi and fresh cuts of beef there.
Further pushing the needle to FSU was the caliber of the current students. I just felt I would be pushed harder there. The culture is the opposite of competitive, but even working with stronger people I know I will get better. The final straw was a reminder (from the fourth year student) of FSU’s professional development commitment. Research productivity is king, but the faculty there know that there are some little things that go a long way to creating success in a first job. So, they spend a lot of time making sure their graduates have more than the makings of a research program when they get hooded. As the fourth year put it,
“Socialization to academia can be difficult. FSU goes above and beyond making sure that we are ready to make the transition”.
Epilogue
I really can’t believe that this part of the process is over. At times over the past four months, it’s felt almost like chasing the sun as it sets on the horizon. I couldn’t imagine what I would feel like. It’s early yet, and I’ll revisit this again when things are settled, but for now I feel a great source of confidence. Some predicted relief, but it’s not really like that. Through the stress, I was able to see that God had given me the freedom to choose and that He would bless me wherever I wound up. Once I made that realization, I had the sense of relief I needed. Now, I just feel confident in my decision and am ready for the next part of the journey.
To that end, there is much more to be told in this story. Thanks to all of you for being a part of it up to now; I hope you’ll continue to keep following, because I don’t plan to stop writing any time soon.
III
A Few Things Worth Mentioning 